porn, erotica and sexual novelty

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porn, erotica and sexual novelty

Post  Sonny on Thu Dec 09, 2010 2:50 am

Contrary to all the right wing and religious zealot propaganda, porn is NOT a problem. Some people have this agenda against porn, or they use the utterly asinine term "over-masturbation". Unless you have some other compulsive type disorder, there is nothing wrong with how much you masturbate or engage in other sexual activity. None of those ideas have any basis in fact or any evidence.

In fact porn makes it easier to get off, which is exactly what you need when you have a condition that makes that difficult. Men are more visually stimulated than women, so for women, erotic or extra steamy romance books might be more your style. You just have to find something you like and are in the mood for at the time. Novelty is also go. Exploring something different that turns you on can help. Also porn that you have not seen before. Maybe you like artistic nudes more, or maybe you like some really hardcore stuff, or maybe it changes with your mood.

It's definitely the best non-drug work around we have for this.

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Re: porn, erotica and sexual novelty

Post  north4 on Mon Apr 18, 2011 11:55 am

A very good overview for Porntubes

http://www.ovguide.com/adult-tubesites-visits-alltime.html

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Re: porn, erotica and sexual novelty

Post  Sonny on Sun Apr 24, 2011 3:18 am

Well ok, as long as this doesn't turn into big thread full of links.....

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Re: porn, erotica and sexual novelty

Post  Maldoror on Sat Oct 27, 2012 6:08 pm

What about ejaculation?

I'm starting to believe ejaculating less often can be good for you and for your relationship:

http://www.medicaldaily.com/articles/10783/20120711/relationships-karezza-orgasm-climax-sensation-repair-marriage-passion.htm

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/cupids-poisoned-arrow/201205/men-does-frequent-ejaculation-cause-hangover


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Re: porn, erotica and sexual novelty

Post  Sonny on Sat Oct 27, 2012 11:19 pm

Those sound a lot like bullshit. There are some red flags I see just taking a quick look. They both seem to have a puritanical sort of presupposition. Concepts like "porn addiction" being used as if they are credible rather than right wing fundie propaganda is another issue. It also seems to ignore human biology. Sperm has a very limited life, fresher sperm is more successful. We also wouldn't be here if we were not a very sexual species. survival was tough at one point. Frequent sex made ones genes more likely to be passed on, therefor nature selects for the horniest creatures around. The problem is that lots of people believe in a god who created this vast universe, yet his primary concern is what one little species on one tiny little planet do with their genitals.

A google search for that book also turns up a lot of fringe sites with people stating as fact, things with absolutely no basis in evidence. Just check out this article, where they talk about the DSM guidelines as if it is some political conspiracy, despite the fact that it is supported by mountains of evidence, and the authors of the article have no evidence at all.

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/cupids-poisoned-arrow/201205/porn-and-dsm-5-are-sexual-politics-play

I wouldn't believe anything you see on those sites. The more I learn about the authors of that book I will not name here, the more they appear to be a couple of nutters.

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Re: porn, erotica and sexual novelty

Post  Maldoror on Sun Oct 28, 2012 12:55 pm

I can't comment on the science, as you are obviously much more knowledgeable on the subject than I am.

But speaking for personal experience, I feel much closer to my partner after sex if I don't ejaculate. And for me that feeling of sustained intimacy is better than 5 seconds of pleasure.

Still, I have nothing against porn (watch it every week). And I still love to ejaculate, with or without my partner.


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Re: porn, erotica and sexual novelty

Post  Maldoror on Sun Oct 28, 2012 1:08 pm

"We also wouldn't be here if we were not a very sexual species. survival was tough at one point. Frequent sex made ones genes more likely to be passed on, therefor nature selects for the horniest creatures around."

But what's good for the passing of your genes may be bad for you, or so I've read?

Their article has so many mentions to PubMed articles, I think discarding them as nutters is too much. But I can't discuss the science with you, unfortunately.


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Re: porn, erotica and sexual novelty

Post  Sonny on Mon Oct 29, 2012 12:56 pm

Linking to pubmed, means nothing when the articles don't support your point. That's called a red herring. The problem is, science is the very issue here. These folks seem to deal in pseudoscience.Their claims are not supported by any proper evidence. Not to mention we have other areas of of science with empirical data that make their claims sound pretty far fetched.

I have seen studies that show that more frequent ejaculation results in a much lower risk of prostate cancer. Granted the methodology gives it a large margin of error, but the results were greater than that margin.

Now I'm not saying that intercourse and orgasm is all there is to it. There is certainly a lot more to sex than that, and it is good to explore that. I'm just saying all the psychological problems they speak of simply are not true. There is no evidence for that. It sounds like nothing more than a new age version of all that victorian anti-masturbation nonsense. They have just moderated it, and dressed it up for a modern audience.

If that's your thing, ok great, you're entitled to that. I'm just saying that there is simply no evidence that NOT doing that has any negative psychological consequences.

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Re: porn, erotica and sexual novelty

Post  Maldoror on Mon Oct 29, 2012 2:15 pm

Ok Sonny, thanks for your input Smile

As for the prostate cancer/ejaculation connection, I think the jury's still out on that one: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Prostate_cancer#Ejaculation_frequency

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Re: porn, erotica and sexual novelty

Post  Sonny on Tue Oct 30, 2012 1:03 am

Actually if you look at that paragraph, the jury is not out. The two studies were different. The more recent study was looking at ejaculation in general. The first was looking at having many sexual partners and a lot of intercourse. The increase risk of STDs is why the first study showed a positive result. These are two different things and it says so in the article.

Let's look at it this way. The links you provided in the first post are about ejaculation, which happens with male orgasm. So they are claiming female orgasm does not cause those problems. So we should see a far greater incidence of these psychological problems in men than in women. Yet we do not.

The other issue is, if you go by the Kinsey report, and other surveys, nearly all men should be raging sex addicts. Supposing that is true, how could you distinguish that behavior from being anything other than normal male behavior?

Other than less aggression, do men with low testosterone (who therefore don't ejaculate much) have better mental health? What about older guys who are less sexually active? Shouldn't we see mental health improve with age? Shouldn't there be an epidemic with teenage boys?

By what mechanism could this possibly happen?

That's just off the top of my head. There are so many ways that this just doesn't add up. It really falls apart under any scrutiny.

But again I want to reiterate that I'm not knocking something you like to do. I'm just saying their claims about all the rest of us aren't true. So there is no reason to do it unless it's something you like. Some people do like that, as well as tease/denial type play, and there's certainly nothing wrong with that.

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Porn could be a problem for people damaged by paxil?

Post  steel on Tue May 07, 2013 9:51 pm

Before I took paxil I could watch as much porn as I wanted, I could masturbate as much as I wanted and my erections were always like steel pipes. For the pre-paxil me, porn did no harm at all.

I've been reading a lot lately about how porn can fry the reward circuit in the brain. For healthy people who never took a SSRI this would not be a problem. But for those of us with PSSD avoiding porn might be helpful because we are already damaged to begin with. This idea is worth some consideration despite the fact that religious zealots are using this idea in their war against porn. Just because some whack jobs side with an idea doesn't necessarily mean the idea is incorrect.

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90 Day no porn, no masturbation, no sex reboot

Post  steel on Tue May 07, 2013 10:42 pm

Apparently some people call it is brain reboot when you go 90 days with no porn, masturbation, or sex. I'm pretty desperate to get my pre-paxil sexual self back so although this is a long shot, I'll give it a try.

I'm hoping that abstaining for 90 days will help with my pssd but there is no scientific evidence that it will help. Oh well, desperate times call for desperate measures.

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Re: porn, erotica and sexual novelty

Post  Sonny on Tue May 07, 2013 11:00 pm

There is no evidence for any of that because it is all bullshit. Lots of people make that claim. It's related to the warped way our culture thinks about sex. Porn has absolutely nothing to do with any problems you are having. It may actually help some people through the sexual novelty, but it depends on what problem you are having. Whether you are talking about a nutter from the religious right, a radical feminist, or new age wacko, there is nothing more evil to them than a man masturbating. Not that you fall into that category, but I'm sure the author of whatever you've been reading does. So I wouldn't give it another thought. Watch porn when you feel like, and don't watch it when you're not in the mood.

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Re: porn, erotica and sexual novelty

Post  Wozzi7 on Mon May 13, 2013 2:31 pm

My personal story with this has been the opposite: since I have no libido, remembering to masturbate is actually difficult for me because I don't really think about sex much nowadays. However, on the days after I masturbate, my libido actually goes UP. There are some days where I even feel hypersexual because all I can think about is sex.

So I think to a certain extent it is kind of "use it or lose it". However, I think orgasm is an important part of it. I currently don't have any problems with genital anhedonia and orgasm so I think that having a few orgasms a week keeps that part of the brain moving.

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